Secure Self
Coaching Program
Transform your relationship by embodying
the identity of a secure partner.
1:1 + Couples Coaching:
Why your relationship has spiraled:
Every human uses on two strategies when it comes to bonding: Anxious Pursuit & Avoidant Withdrawal.
Think of it this way, there’s only two directions we can possibly go in any given moment with a partner: towards or away. And depending on our early childhood environment, we learned that it was safer - or more effective - to employ the strategy that was most successful in bonding with mom, dad, or care giver.
The problem of the Avoidant Strategy is that it fails to be vulnerable and dependent on a partner.
Resulting in withdrawal, self-sabotage, and fear of intimacy.
The problem of the Anxious Strategy is that elevates the needs of its partner and abandons itself.
Resulting in chasing, self-abandonment, and fear of being alone.
When we don’t change our attachment strategies we will inevitably fail to find the safe “center” of security.
How to create security in your relationship.
Session 01: Attachment Styles
Understanding your attachment styles will clarify your greatest fight patterns and how to achieve security.
Session 02: Fighting Fair
Learning to fight fair eliminates the competition of who is right and who is wrong, and focuses on the real goal of emotional connection.
Session 03: Emotions & Identity
The reason why we are most resistant towards change is because we unconsciously make the emotions we feel the truth of our identity. Learning to separate them can allow us to simply feel our feelings in real time.
Session 04: Conflict Repair
We repair conflict when we learn to observe our thoughts, feel our feelings, and voice our vulnerability.
Session 05: Acknowledging our Impact
We evaluate ourselves according to our intentions, not our impact. When we understand the full impact we’ve made on our partner we can learn to care deeply about their well-being.
Session 06: Accessing the Self
The Self is the part of us that can observe our emotions without becoming our emotions. When we learn how to access the Self we can explore our shadows and communicate from strength.
Session 07: Healing Parent Wounds
Without realizing it we often replay our childhood role with our partner. When we identify the role we played we can heal the wounds that keeps us from connection.
Session 08: Fondness, Admiration, & Shared Dreams
Mistrust develops when we have a poor view of our partner. Learning to cultivate a positive view can generate gratitude. And having shared dreams of the future gives us a motivation that’s bigger than ourselves.
Hi, I’m Drew and I’m from Rochester, Michigan.
My wife, Natalie, and I got married in 2016 after 3 years of dating. As we navigated life together, I exhibited so many Avoidant tendencies. No matter how much I tried to listen and repair our conflict, my avoidance of true vulnerability eroded trust and connection. Additionally I had Anxious traits that helped me realized I was a Fearful Avoidant Attachment style. Once I showed up to work on myself, I was able to tend to my attachment wounds through vulnerability, emotional regulation, and taking responsibility. I’ve had my Coaching Practice since 2021 and have helped hundreds of clients move into the most secure version of themselves.
Please fill out the form below - I would love to work with you!
